Living THE life?

"This is the life others can only dream about."

I saw this slogan handwritten on an Asiana planner that must have been forgotten here at the computer area of the office. Wow. She must be living the life. Well, why wouldn't she? She's in her own country, with her family, and possibly her boyfriend/husband too. Then you work, get the money and travel. That's really got to be the "life others can only dream about."

This isn't true for me though. I'm a very domesticated person and though I love to travel and see places too, I realized it isn't as fun when you do it alone. You get to London and see all the architecture but no one to share your awe to. You see the Statue of Liberty and no one's there to take your picture. Who's gonna go with you to climb the Angkor Wat?

The sadder part, is being away from my family. Not only do you feel greatly left out during flights--with everyone speaking their language and you're on your own on how to amuse yourself, like counting how many seconds/minutes it takes before the next passenger call button is pressed.

For the past few days, I've been itching to go home. I know, my scheduled flight home is not for another 10days or so, but I have been trying to find a way to cut that short. My lolo, who was in the hospital when I left Manila, had not been eating. Dad told me they hadn't been avoiding the subject of death so as to prepare Lola of what may come. I felt so helpless. I'm here, nobody to share my loneliness, sadness and grief to; not at home even to be with the person I fear won't make it long.

I don't know what else to say.