As final as it can get

I think I didn't make it. The minute we walked into the room, the judges were just looking at our legs! One even had to lift her skirt a bit so that they'd see her knees. Then came introduction and answering the Why you wanted to be a flight attendant question. (Lucky we didn't pick a question from a fishbowl.) After which the judges are supposed to ask questions. Well, they sure didn't ask me a lot of questions, unlike some other girls of my batch. Absolutely least interest in me.

Feeling so stumped I proceeded to one of my favorite chapels in Makati--Tereza Gomez Chapel--and sat. Then knelt. And sat up again... Allowing my exposed shoulders to chill.

Post-interview, I was frowning while walking, even just crossing Ayala. And not even a box of McNuggets, as I've told Niko, would cheer me up. I even intended to buy a happy meal (trying my luck if it makes me happy at all) but they ran out of the red car toys--for the Cars promo--and was giving me a van toy instead. Sheesh.

While munching, I broke the almost-official bad news to my mom, who in turn replied: As long as you did your best there's no turning back. Just move forward. You're great and you know it. How would I, now that I'm doubting my skills.

And the worst part, I go home and have to tell my sibs I think I didn't make it in the most casual and no-emotions way. I so want to cry but I have to ask my bro how's his first day in college, or how's my sister's second day in the new school, or attend to Yana and make her giggle. And in between watching My Girl I get teary eyed while my sister's laughing at Jasmine.

I happened to surf past Disney channel, showing Princess Diaries 2. This song always makes me want to cry. Maybe coz it embodies what I really want?

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til I touch the sky
I gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway.