More or less, I've been drinking almost everyday for about eleven weeks straight now. "Almost" means I take an alcohol break at least once a week--so that's 6 days a week on alcohol. I started doing so after the breakup turned really bad, and all I used to do was cry. I turned to alcohol because I didn't want to cry, and all I wanted is to immediately fall asleep once I get home. Wandering around the apartment sober, at that time, was just so difficult.
Eventually, I learned the art of drinking. I enjoy conversations, new knowledge, meeting new people, going out of the comfort zone, observing people, and in due course, partying. I learned how to be carefree, plan less, be worry free, and to just go with the flow. Floating and learning a lot. I also developed my knowledge on how to be careful even when I'm drinking--crediting my increased alcohol tolerance, helping me act sane through bottles and shot glasses.
We may have started off on the wrong foot, but I am thankful for having my beer bud. He is very patient in accompanying me on alcohol days, we talk about anything under the sun, he pushes me to go out of my bounds at times. The best part being? No complications. He isn't aiming to be my boyfriend, I'm not aiming to be a girlfriend. We're just two people who like to hang out and learn on a daily basis. (I teach him food, he on drinks.) All the things he's made me do, I won't be able to do if I didn't trust him.
Like, whatever drink he lets me try, I know he'd take me home in case I pass out, or pat my back if I throw up. He's made me dance to overcome the shyness, and now I dance like I don't care who's watching (he now can't keep up with the dancing, haha). He's placed me in situations that would have been so uncomfortable--like having me seated in a group guys I don't know--all to enhance my 'socialization' skills. He's taken me to all sorts of places: from the poshest super clubs in the Fort and RWM, to residential-garage-serving-beers in Guijo, even to a gay bar in Malate. He's taught me how to enjoy my nights, but still be able to go to work in the morning. He's taught me to observe and know which type of people to avoid.
Yes, it's a very different me. To some it may seem like a negative thing, but for me, it's a refreshing thing. Being out of my comfort zone is scary at first, but I'm having fun. It may just be a phase, but it's a phase I'm glad to have gone through well--safe and comfortable.