Tuesday, May 22, 2012

To AA, From CC

AA,

Though you'll never get to read this, I want you to know how much I miss you everyday. You ask me not to cry, you ask me not to dwell on it, nor drink and smoke. I say, this will only be for a few months, and a few months of 'wasted-ness' is worth it as this is for a year and a half of happy times with you. 

You are by far the best boyfriend I had--the care, the love and affection. I'm sorry that this didn't work out for you. I'm sorry that all the guidance I gave seemed as if I was a dictator in your life, manning what you should or should not be doing. I'm sorry you lost your identity and that you gave up things you loved for me, even though I never asked for it. I wish you'd find yourself again, and gain back the confidence you lost. 

I'm sorry that I think way too mature for you and you felt the pressure mounting on you to be on the same level as I am. Know that I intended nothing bad; I had nothing but support for you. I am unhappy when you are frustrated with work, family, or anything, and my advice seemed too imperative for you. You may have felt that I didn't feel proud of you, but ask all my friends and listen that I had nothing but good words for you. Support was everything I gave, but you felt otherwise. I was only pushing you because I knew you can, and that success will complete you.

It hurts that you can't give this another chance; it hurts even more knowing that you were very much willing to reconcile with your exes in the past even after you caught them cheating. I'm hoping that you will regain your trust in women, that there is at least one person who loves you enough not to cheat on you.

I don't know how to be strong, all my friends are wondering why I'm not. I used to be, but when I met you, you became my strength. Now I feel like a pillar-less building. 

When the time comes that you're lost or not sure which path to take, I will always be here ready to help you out. I will be invisible for quite sometime; for the meantime, I just need to blend in and be unnoticeable. 

Though I would like to hold on to your promise of coming back once everything is sorted out, I also know that life is not always as we planned. And one day you may find someone who can do so much more than what I have. 

To end this, I just wanna say that I hope you never forget me. That there's one person who loves you unconditionally to set you free and let you do your own thing, prepare for the future...even if she knew that that future may not include her. Thank you for everything. 

Love always,
CC

Friday, May 18, 2012

Everybody Hurts Sometimes

So I'm so wasak right now. I'm turning to music, as I always do.

"How many times can I break 'til I shatter / Over the line can't define what I'm after..."  - Shattered, O.A.R.

"Never thought not having you here now would hurt so much / Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up / I need your loving hands to come pick up / And every night I miss you..."  - Tonight, FM Static

"It's all ending / I gotta stop pretending who we are / You and me, I can see us dying...are we?" - Don't Speak, No Doubt

"If you're on your own in this life / The days and nights are long / When you think you've had too much of this life to hang on / Well everybody hurts / Everybody cries / Everybody hurts sometimes"  - Everybody Hurts, REM

"U got it, U got it bad / If you miss a day without your friend / Your whole life's off-track / You know you got it bad when you're stuck in the house / You don't wanna have fun / It's all you think about"  - U Got It Bad, Usher

"Please don't turn your back / I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you / But you don't understand"  -Perfect, Simple Plan

"Here comes the rain again, falling from the stars / Drenched in my pain again, becoming who we are"  - Wake Me Up When September Ends, Green Day

I only think of you and it's breaking my heart / I'm trying to keep it together / But I'm falling apart"  - We Belong Together, Mariah Carey


Note: I may be hibernating from blogging, like how I'm hibernating from Facebook right now. Maybe. Please save nasty comments to yourself, I don't really need them right now. 
xoxo


Thursday, May 10, 2012

When You Say "Why Me?"

A couple of nights ago, I was home alone sulking and was trying to watch TV to divert my attention. I even watched Justin Bieber's "Never Say Never" documentary/movie to keep my mind off things. After Bieber's story, I had to find something else because HBO was showing Salt--which I've seen several times. I surf through channels and end up watching Reel Time on GMA News TV.

So the lady had operations and radiation treatments during pregnancy and now, with the help of different mothers, feeds her baby with other people's breastmilk. Quite touching story; commending those other mothers. She goes to say:

"Nagtanong din ako sa Dyos, 'Bakit ako?' pero humingi rin ako ng tawad sa pagtatanong ko. Syempre, Dyos lang naman ang nakakaalam ng dahilan kung bakit ka binibigyan ng mga ganitong pagsubok. Sino naman ako para kwestiyunin diba?" 

(Translation: "I even asked God, 'Why me?' but I also asked for forgiveness for asking. Of course, only He knows the reasons why He gives us these trials. Who am I to question him?")

It just made my eyes well up all the more.

Friday, May 04, 2012

Mis-sent Globe Bill

With nothing much to do on a five-hour ride to Baguio, I checked my emails. I am subscribed to Globe Telecom's e-statements and receive both my bills through email. The PDFs are encrypted and password protected with the format (last name) + (last 4 digits of mobile number.) 

As soon as I viewed the PDF file, it got me wondering how I could have a credit of more than five hundred pesos, whereas I always pay my bills exactly to the last centavo. Browse, browse, browse... I realized it was not my plan. Scroll up. Holy smokes! It isn't even my bill! Outrageous. I immediately thought of contacting the account holder stated on the bill since I have his mobile number and name. Sent him an SMS telling him I'll be complaining about it through email and would like to cc him. The next day, he did reply, though I think he might have called the hotline already for his own version of complaints. 

It's just unbelievable that they can make a mistake like that. It poses several threats to the safety and security of not only the account holder but to his contacts:
  • Recipient knows the name, mobile number, and address of the account holder. With this information, it is easy to look up most of other information you need.
  • You can probably even stalk the person. Or become an unwanted texter.
  • The recipient can also 'scam' the contacts (since all calls are itemized for postpaid bills) by introducing himself as the account holder...you get the point.
By this year alone, that's strike two for Globe Telecom. Bad. Very bad.


Thursday, May 03, 2012

If You Don't Know BNWT, It's Time to Get Buffaloed!

I can't believe I haven't blogged about Buffalo's Wings N' Things! (Or maybe I have? But I'm too lazy to check on it.) Just to let everyone know, I am NOT a fan of buffalo wings. One is because I don't like the wing part because it's too dry--I'm a dark meat girl. Second is I feel so bad that they had to murder the wings with those red tabasco-ish sauce and drench them, like they do at Don Henrico's. They should have just fried it like Max's and it would have been edible.

And then I met Buffalo's Wings N' Things. My first time was because a friend was friends with one of the managers at the Ortigas Home Depot branch, and we had to meet there. Initial reaction: Gawd, why a Buffalo Wing place, of all places?! So we ordered, and have forever changed my thoughts on the 'murdered' ones.

BWNT offers servings per half pound, which is good for one person like me, one pound or triple sampler (1.5pound). Good part is that you get to choose the 'fire' level, you can choose flavors per half pound of wings. I always go for Rookie, the least spicy. Odd for someone who eats fire-red Korean food. Maybe I just don't like tabasco that much. They have about six variations of the spiciness level: Rookie, New York's Finest, Firehouse Classic, Nuclear, Armageddon--forgive me if I forgot something--plus a couple or so of non-spicy choices something like Garlic Parmesan and Honey BBQ(?)

But, for me, the BEST part is that the wings are not soaked with the sauce. It is served, hot, crispy and have just added the sauce on top! I always add Bleu Cheese especially when I don't order their Dirty Rice. They do not serve plain rice, just NY Dirty Rice which the boyfriend says is too Mediterranean for his nose.

One Pound of "Rookie" wings, Bleu Cheese on the side, and a cup of NY Dirty Rice.

They also serve nachos, fries, burgers and beer! Don't the wings just go well with the beer? I'm heading over the the BNWT Quezon City branch tomorrow for drinks with friends. This is definitely a place worth sharing with your friends!