[Last night] So frustrated and quite depressed on how things are going lately, I tried to shift my thoughts to something else by watching Denise Richards and Dean Cain on the Hallmark channel. But at midnight after the movie, I went downstairs, headed to the sofa clutching a stuffed toy and did the ultimate stress relief--cry.
It's depressing that I still don't have a good job right now. Good job openings [related to my course] are very scarce. I know for myself that I could land a good job if only there is one. Or if only I was close to physical perfection.
Yesterday, I went to this international chain of hotel and everything went smoothly until my interviewer informed me that the job openings they have are for contractuals. Boogsh! One more thing. On June 2 I'm supposed to be in front of a panel of interviewers, in perfect shape, posture and skin. Half month before the big day, some sort of allergies come up. Boogsh! Perfect timing. Gah, I do need a miracle for my skin. The dermatologist can't do anything about it. Ugh.
Though some people don't really need jobs (or maybe don't just yet realize how important an immediate and fulfilling job is for others), I do need one. And it's not just because I'm still lacking on monetary fund for my brother's thirty-five-thousand-per-sem tuition fee. (Not that it's big, for you La Sallians and Ateneans out there.) Somehow the idleness makes you feel so worthless that you'd even consider going to the PBB Season 2 auditions. For some it's just a career. For me it's a life. It's fulfillment. It's... me.
"Coz you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around..."