Monday, July 17, 2006

Bee happy? Not.

I'm having a sinking feeling today. I was actually on my bed trying to sleep but it's like I had this super moodswing that I feel so sad. Or low.

Though I had everything I wanted from Jollibee--for my sister had a lot delivered to our doorstep (hey, they deliver everything now, like the TVC says) as her birthday lunch, so of course I had spaghetti, mushroom and cheese burger, sundae and fries--it didn't lift my spirits. Not a bit. Bee happy? Not.

We're a modernly traditional family so we had to wait 'til everybody was home before we had the birthday dinner. In our family, if it's your birthday, you decide on everything on that day: activities, food, celebrations, etc. Since it's a working day, Mika decided to have a dinner instead, with all the Japanese food that she always craves for. Defying the chosen cuisine, there were birthday must-haves of course: cake and noodles. The chocolate mousse said, Happy birthday Mommy! Love, Yana in bright red, and number candles proudly announcing that she's nineteen now. Lovely. It's her first birthday with Yana.

As I'm gobbling up tons of wasabi-dipped sashimi I can't help but think that this is the week that I might be waiting for--more like dreading--the most. The medical results should be out by this week, and according to the receptionist at the medical/diagnostic center, the physician did not mark me Fit to Work due to my dermatological condition, and they have forwarded the results to the company. So I'm like 70% sure that I won't make it. Just how Heidi Klum always says on my favorite reality show, "it's either you're in, or you're out."

Though I'm most probably on the "out" list, I can't get myself to start all over again and apply for different companies again, whether through Jobstreet or on newspaper classifieds. I'm probably waiting for the company's I-regret-to-inform-you email notifying me to drop by their office to pick-up my passport. Something like a closure. Ayii, parang sa relationships haha.

Dad says I've got to find more dermatologists, that at least two or three of them should be able to give me the same verdict. (Recap: I've seen three already, all with different versions as to what my derma condition is.) Maybe I'll discuss the latest one on my next post.

To my greatest e-friend: Yea I am glad you are online. Really.

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