Picks! Pix!
Currently feeling: Uneasy
Listening to: These Days by Bamboo

Really, what's gotten into me that I feel like posting (and posting and posting...) photos lately? I still don't know. Oh geez I'm a bit itchy right now, I had a glass of Novellino whites and its effects are starting to show (and be felt)... I'm allergic to alcoholic drinks kase. Anyway, on with the pictures!!

First picture is me and my siblings together with our paternal grandparents. That's kuya, Lolo, Lola, Miko, (seated) me and my very pregnant younger sister Mika. For the second picture, I believe you're not clueless on who they are. :)

Third photo is me and my sister and kuya posing with the book which my kuya gave his sisters: Cosmopolitan's Man Management. Haha what a gift! Next photo, that's me at our living room. Don't I blend well with the tablecloth?!

Lastly, that's still me, while struggling with Chinese language. My mom took this shot and thanks to my lola's very bright Christmas lights I looked like a monster ahihihi... I feel like posting my wackiest photos but decided against it. Baka maging Halloween tong Christmas special ko eh. Hehehehe..

Ho Ho Ho

Merry Christmas everyone! So this is how my day went:

24 December
20:00 went to my lola's house for Christmas dinner
22:00 went to Misa de Aguinaldo with my whole family plus grandparents
23:30 got a call from XYH, greeting me 'Meli Klismas' ;)

25 December
00:00 Noche buena at home, plus gifts and all
03:00 Sleep time, but a rowdy neighbor prevented us all from doing so
07:00 People began dropping by the house, I'm still curled up
10:00 I finally got up, went down stairs wearing my jogging pants and a big shirt, helped out in entertaining guest, preparing food and managing gifts
17:30 The calm after the storm, finally, I was able to take a bath and change into presentable clothes!
19:20 Another call from China
19:30 Dinner at my lola's house again, afterwards we'll be giving gifts and opening them here too...

Congratulations
Currently feeling: Christmas-y
Listening to: Jackson 5 CD

I forgot to include in my last post: congratulations to my kuya, for winning the Employee of the Year award at Diamond Hotel Philippines. Reitirating, you deserve it! Hehe, balato naman? Hihihi model? Baka model employee! Idol!

Salamat sa Ice Monster at Tempura Grill treat.

Pre Christmas
Currently feeling: Alright
Listening to: All I Want for Christmas is You

Hmm.. The first photo is the view from the bottom of the giant Christmas tree in UST. Such a spectacular display of lights and lanterns. Too bad my mobile phone's camera's resolution isn't as nice as a digital cam's. Haha... The fireworks during the Paskuhan celebration was superb! Although it wasn't as long as the fireworks display during the closing ceremonies of the SEA Games, it's okay. Whatever... (What am I saying?!)

The next photo is me posing in front of the Fountain of Life (please correct me if I'm wrong) found in UST also. Nung Paskuhan ko lang ata nakita yan na may ilaw at umaandar hehe... It should be visible if you're along Espana Boulevard at night. After the Paskuhan program, many students--and non Thomasians alike--still loitered around the campus to enjoy the lights display throughout the university. Lights everywhere! Main building, Arch of the Centuries, Benavides Park, Grandstand. Literally, everywhere. I appreciated that the Architecture building (Beato Angelico) had its own lantern display. :)

Okay enough of my Paskuhan stint. But honestly, the fun factor does not and will not depend on the program per se, it's dependent on who you're with. I enjoyed hanging around and loitering around, slumped on the soccer field with my classmates. It's our last, for god's sake. Argh, I said enough of the Paskuhan thingies. Hahaha...

What else should I be blogging about? Oh! I just got home from Makati tonight. I did contract signing (parang endorser huh?) with PeopleSupport already! I am officially employed [part time]! I am excited eventhough employment would mean that I can't go to our class' retreat and the Puerto Galera trip for my thesis. It's okay, it's alright, gee wee yo I look alright! hahaha cheering squad?!

Oh, and yeah. I was wondering why the free email services that most of us have (Yahoo, Gmail, Hotmail) don't have Stationery features. Like in Yahoo, you have to sign up for Yahoo Mail Plus. Hmmmppp... My Chinese boyfriend's been sending me emails with cutsie BGs coz his email provider, 126, has it. I'm envious!

Anyway, I might not be online until after Christmas, so allow me to greet all of you a MERRY CHRISTMAS and a joyous New Year! I hope y'all have worthwhile holidays.

Home Alone
Currently feeling: Bored
Listening to: All I Want for Christmas is You

I'm home alone because my family went to Bulacan for my maternal grandmother's birthday celebration. And I have to be at home to wait until 2pm so that I'd be going to school for the Paskuhan, starting from the parade. I intend to finish the whole event, and that's gonna end at around midnight. Ang masaya pa dun, walang susundo sakin, at wala rin namang sasakyan para dalhin. Aios. So out of boredom I'm answering this survey I got from Tin's blog.

+ + +

What...
1) bothers you right now? = that he's in China and I'm in the Philippines
2) is your favorite time of the year? = I used to love Christmas season
3) was your dream last night? = OMG, he died coz he flew off a motorbike driven by someone
4) is your greatest fear? = to be unloved
5) was the best thing that happened to you this week? = uh, sleep?
6) are you planning to do this weekend? = wala.
7) can you promise to the one you love? = I did, the promise we made to wait for each other
8) will you wish for if you have a genie? = Mandarin fluency

Who...
1) are you thinking of right now? = XYH
2) do you run to when you're down? = friends, friends, friends. Can't live w/o them.
3) are the most influential people in your life right now? = dad and mom
4) was the last person you went out with? = if it's a date, it's XYH. Otherwise, it's Jeno.
5) is the one you're missing right now? = Xiao Yong Heng! :(
6) will you call/text later? = college friends, Paskuhan eh
7) completes your day? = my carebear
8) starts your day? = nobody

When...
1) will you take a bath? = after lunch
2) will you watch a movie? = maybe before 2005 ends, maybe not
3) was the first time you fell in love? = 16?
4) was the last time you went out with your friends? = hang out lang eh
5) was the last time you said "I love you"? = 14th of December
6) was the last time you read a book? = a month ago
7) was the last time you asked for help? = last night, searching for a B+ person
8) was the last time you kissed your dad/mom = this morning
9) did you last receive a gift? = 04 Dec. The CareBear

Do...
1) you have a crush? = nope
2) you believe in love? = of course.
3) you easily get attracted to the opposite sex? = no. it's a wonder what happened between me and the Chinese guy actually
4) you get jealous easily? = nope

Eto pa.
1) Anyone in love with you right now? = I hope he does love me.
2) Want to get married? = yup, with the right person hopefully.
3) Ever did something unusual for love? = Shempre.
4) What do you notice first in a person? = the eyes
5) Last person you fell in love with or currently in love with? = XYH
6) Are you missing someone right now? = nobody else but him.

+ + +

As I was answering this survey, I got a call I have long been waiting for. The call center in which I've been applying for a part time position finally called to inform me of the job offer schedule [that is, contract signing, etc.]. Finally! They've been calling me up these days about work character references, and I keep telling them I haven't really worked pa naman so sino ibibigay ko? Well anyway, at least my application's moving.

+ + +

There's this Christmas song by Britney Spears that I really like, nakabisado ko na from shopping at SM malls the previous years. It's only now that I've searched for the title and complete lyrics. As I have researched, lyrics sites are quite confused on the real title of the song. Some posted it as "Santa Can You Hear Me" or "All I Want for Christmas" and "My Only Wish This Year". But I think I'll go for "My Only Wish". He he he. Ho ho ho.

My Only Wish [Britney Spears]

Oh yeah yeah... / Last night I took a walk in the snow / Couples holdin hands, places to go / Seems like everyone but me is in love /Santa can you hear me? / I signed my letter that I sealed with kiss / I sent it off, it just said this: "i know exactly what I want this year" / Santa can you hear me? / I want my baby, baby /I want someone to love me, someone to hold /Maybe maybe /He'll be all my own in a big red bow

**Santa can you hear me? / I have been so good this year /And all I want is one thing / Tell me my true love is here / He's all I want, just for me / Underneath my christmas tree / I'll be waiting here / Santa that's my only wish this year

Yeahh... / Christmas eve, I just can't sleep / Would I be wrong for takin a peek / Cuz I heard that you're comin to town / Santa can you hear me? / I really hope that you're on your way / With something special for me in your sleigh / Oh please make my wish come true / Santa can you hear me? / I want my baby, baby / I want someone to love me, someone to hold / Baby, baby, baby / We'll be all alone under the mistletoe**

I hope my letter reaches you in time / Bring me love I can call all mine / Cuz I have been so good this year / Can't be alone under the mistletoe /He's all I want in a big red bow.**

Ahh ahh ahh / Oh santa, can you hear me...? /Oh santa, well he's all I want / Just for me, underneath my christmas tree / I'll be waiting here / Santa that's my only wish this year / Santa that's my only wish this year.

Christmas in Your Hearts
Currently feeling: Numb
Listening to: Sorry by Cueshe

My mom used to tell me that all her children are of blood type B since both my parents are. It was a shock to know today that I'm an O+. I had a blood typing test because I was supposed to donate plasma for my godfather's son, Jason. It's such a sad thing that I wasn't a B+ because they really need donors right now. He's in a critical condition due to Dengue, and I took every precaution yesterday (not to stay up late, no alcoholic beverages, etc.) just to be qualified as a donor, and the most important one, compatibility, failed my hopes to help the person in need.

I don't know what got into me that I opted to put a small photo of me here on my blog page. Just felt like doing something different by starting with the 'Life is waiting' blog title.

Tomorrow's Paskuhan already; Paskuhan is the university wide Christmas celebration. I am looking forward to it, but I don't think I'm as excited as everybody else. I think I'm gonna be there for the sake that it's my last Paskuhan as a college student (unless of course, I fail a subject and be disqualified for graduation). Anyway, I bought a green shirt for the parade (I never even knew that there's a parade per college, until this year haha) because my section opted for my suggestion to go rainbow colors RoyGBiv. As the student council president said, the more colors the better. Right. Whatever.

Hmm, Christmas spirit is really not with me this year huh? I don't feel it. I haven't even gone Christmas shopping, not even clothes for myself, and I don't intend to buy gifts at all. Except for my lone inaanak. This is odd.

Falling Apart
Currently feeling: Torn
Listening to: Eraserheads Anthology

I am falling apart. I am failing. In most, if not all, aspects of my life right now. It would definitely be success for me if I'd be able to survive this point in life. Really, all aspects.

Faith. It's decreasing, if not diminishing. This is my worst fear. I do not want this to happen but it is happening. Love. I love, but am I loved? Nobody can say for sure. And words are never enough. Still I hold on. *sheesh* Academics. The obvious and sure effect of the first two: academic failure. I am losing my interest; I don't even have the energy to get up each morning and don my uniform and go to school. Career. I thought I'd have this one by now. Pero wala pa rin. Family and friends. I'm not the usual me. I am alive, but not living.

Busy Bee
Currently feeling: So-so
Listening to: Speed of Sound by Coldplay

I've been trying to keep myself busy with anything at all just so it'd take my mind off those things. I'm applying for a part time job. Basically that's it, will blog later for more details. Sigh.

Faith in Fate
Currently feeling: Full of questions
Listening to: Somewhere Down the Road

Today I said I won't cry anymore, after having cried almost every day for almost a week now. Still, I did. But, for a different reason. My friend Godfrey's sister, Rea, passed away today. She's just a fifteen year old girl, on her last high school year, dreams soaring, aiming high. She slept last night feeling a numbing headache, then nightmare, then disaster. Aneurism's the term, I think. Everything's so sudden, with really no warnings at all.

My body shook when I heard the news (through SMS). I cannot believe she's gone. She's the joy of their family, the ever-friendly to anyone who visits their home, the dreamer, the ambitious. My friend was actually finding a job to finance for her debut three years from now because Rea wants a grand one. She's supposed to be out with Noh (another friend of mine) on Sunday because she made 'hirit' to him to treat her out for a Starbucks frap. She's already saving up for kitchen tools because she wants to take up HRM after graduation. Now everything's history.

All that my friend could say between sobs is, "Why? She's so young, and she's got dreams and hopes to fulfill..." To which I could not say anything plausible. Though personally I think it's not a very satisfying answer (for if I was given the answer, I'd still question it), I said "God has a plan." Oh sh_t. I myself, I am not convinced with this answer [yet] when I asked about my currently super down self. And now, I am giving the answer out as if I know what it means?

I tried to be emotionally strong all the while that he's crying to me, hugging him when he needs it. Inasmuch as I am a crybaby, I congratulate myself for not crying in front of him who needs a strong friend to lean on. Once I got home, I went straight to the altar and plopped down. Then I started crying. I was like, "God, they always say You have a plan, and everything that happens in our life is according to Your plan. But still I can't understand why such things are happening. This is too much to be an emotional strength test. It's too much to give for one week." I know I should not be questioning Him but, how could I not? It is too much. My heart is breaking every day, getting crushed all the more. Let me know You're there. May I please even take a glimpse on what's Your plan like? Can I have my life with less guessing games please? I know I can't. And, yes, I still have faith in fate.

Of Tears and Putonghua
Currently feeling: Weak
Listening to: I'm Missing You

These are the thoughts currently running through my head.
1. Whatever will be, will be.
2. Let time pass by. Time heals. The answers come with time.
3. Be prepared. A coin always has two sides.
4. There's always a reason for everything.
5. God has a plan.
6. Love is beautiful, but never painless.
7. Just be thankful it happened.
8. Xiexie ni de ai. Hen xiang ni. Yong heng.

Yongheng
Currently listening to: MYMP
Currently feeling: Sad


Yea it's meant to be blurry. It's a stolen sweet moment with him. No, I am NOT seated on his lap, like what most people say when they saw this pic. It's just that he's half-seated, half-lying. Okay? Gosh I miss him so much. Xiang ni, Xiao... Ni bu wang wo. Wo deng ni. Pinky-swear.

Unpublished Lit
Currently feeling: Adventurous
Listening to: Stick Around by Azure

I borrowed this Economics book from my sister's batchmate and it appears like the book had been lent and/or passed on for at least five times already. Unsurprisingly, there are scribbles, different names [of the different 'owners'] and some papers in between the pages. I found this essay which is apparently an assignment or seatwork maybe. Graded 95%, handwritten on a sheet of yellow paper, and penmanship's undeniably a guy's. Read on. Sorry for typos. For the author of this essay, thank me then for I've published your work. I like it, really. =P

Ang Aking Pananaw sa Aking Ginagalawang Buhay
by Bryle Jay-R L. Cruz

Napakasarap isiping ako'y nabubuhay sa ibabaw ng ating ginagalawang mundo. Pero, karapat-dapat ba akong maging masaya sa aking nararanasan ngayon? Ano nga ba ang tunay na halaga ng buhay? Ito ba'y isang matamis na gunitain o kaya'y isang madilim na kahapon na dapat ibaon sa limot?

Sa bawat pagsikat ng araw sa ating bansa ay hindi mawawala ang samut-saring kaguluhan o krimen na nagaganap sa ating bansa. Siguro nga ay parte na ito ng bawat Pilipino na nakaririnig o nakababasa ng mga balitang katulad ng nakawan, patayan o kaya'y kaguluhan sa ating pulitika. Sabi nga ng ibang tao ay tinuturing na lang nila itong almusal sa umaga. E ano ba naman ang magagawa natin sa mga ito? Hindi naman tayo pwedeng gumawa o maghanap ng gaya ni Superman o kaya'y Batman para mapigilan ang mga ito. Talaga ngang maituturing natin ang ating bansa na bukod tangi sa mga bansa sa mundo.

Siguro nga at ako'y isang simpleng estudyante na nagsisikap at umaasang minsa'y malalampasan ang mga pagsubok na aking hinaharap at haharapin sa aking buhay. Maihahalintulad ko rin ang aking sarili sa isang halaman sa paso na hindi mabubuhay kung walang magdidilig at magaalaga sa akin. Pinili kong umpisahan ito sa mga problemang kinakaharap ng ating bansa dahil nais kong ibahagi ang aking pananaw sa aking buhay na puno ng pagsubok upang ako'y mahubog bilang isang tunay na tao. Sa pamamagitan ng mga ito, napatunayan ko sa aking sarili ang kahalagahan ng pamilya, kaibigan at determinasyon upang malampasan ang mga ito. Napakagaling talaga ng ating Diyos at naisip niyang gumawa at ipadama sa atin ang kahalagahan ng ating buhay. Aaminin ko na minsa'y naging mahina rin ako at sumuko pero ang nagpalakas sa aking loob ay ang mga taong nasa lansangan na kailangan pang mamalimos para lamang may pantawid sa kanilang gutom. Sabi ko sa aking sarili, kung sila nakaya nila, bakit ako hindi?

Nais kong tapusin ang sanaysay na ito sa pagsasabing, "Ang buhay ay puno ng kulay, nasa sa iyo na ito kung paano mo ito makikita." Siguro nga na ang buhay ng isang tao ay binigay upang ito'y tuklasin kung ano nga ba ang maibabahagi mo sa ibang tao na nangangailangan nito. Pero ako, masasabi ko na nasa oras pa lang ako na patuloy kong inaalam ang ibig sabihin ng aking buhay. Ikaw, alam mo na ba?

Mixed Emotions
Currently feeling: Weird
Listening to: Silent Night by Boyz II Men

Nyeta ba't ganun. Ang sad. Pero masaya na din naman. I'm disgusted. Appreciative. Critique. Nakakapanghinayang pero di naman pwedeng nagsasayang ng oras. Nakakatanga na nakakabaliw. Anu ba naman to. Nakakasawa pa. Pero okay pa rin. Shef! Weird.

Unfortunate?
Currently feeling: Hyped
Listening to: Burn by Tina Arena

Yesterday, we went to PICC for our second training as LOs for the SEA Games. We rode the UST bus which got me excited since I haven't been able to ride it ever. Sobrang hirap hiramin ng mga lecheng bus na nakapark lang madalas! Anyway for those people who don't know, two sections were chosen from our school to participate as Liason Officers for the said event. I think the PhilSOC got 60 students from each of the different schools. Anyway, during the morning session, there were students from FEATI University, UP Diliman, University of Makati, Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Pasig, and I-forgot-what-other-schools. Congratulations to my university, we've got the most exciting sport to LO upon: Table tennis! *darn* And it's Bayview Park Hotel. *darn darn darn*

Gad, I think I'm kinda stressed out. I need a getaway! Boracay, anyone? Libre niyo ko huh! ;P Speaking of Bora, I was browsing through a friend's Friendster account, when I saw their pics (of my friend and the honey) at Bora. And Puerto Galera. And Subic. Goshhhh... I don't know if I'm envy because they went to such beautiful places or because they're together (coz I don't have anybody to be together with).

Of Needs and Wants
Currently feeling: Sickly
Listening to: 7Days in Sunny June by Jamiroquai

I was so amused with Ma'am Bermudez during our ETAR (Economics with Taxation and Agrarian Reform, if I'm not mistaken) course today. She was discussing the introduction to college economics with wit and fun. Her lecture went like this:

So, 'demand' refers to what we need and want. By the way, how do you differentiate a 'need' from a 'want'? According to Kotler need's dictionary meaning is depravity of (from?) something. Meaning, you don't have that thing. He incorporated this definition to his explanation of a need from a want.

Need, as he therefore explained, is when you don't have the thing. Want, on the other hand, is still a need itself--but, with a personal touch. Let's say you're hungry, you say, "I'm hungry. I need food. I want fried chicken."

For someone who is--or was--not an Economics student, the phrase 'I need you' may be the sweetest thing she'd want to hear. And 'I want you' is offensive. But you, you'd never see it like the way it seemed before. I mean--technically speaking Economics--I need you is more like the person needs somebody because there is absolutely nobody. While, I want you means you are the person's choice.

If you're gonna say it, say it something like this: "I need a friend. I want that friend to be you." *applause* Well if you still want to make it more elaborate, here: I need a friend. I want that friend to be you. I want you to be my friend so much that I need you.

This is absolutely amazing. Got us all clapping and smiling. :)

Geek in the Pink
Currently feeling: Sleepy
Listening to: Computer beeps

Have lots to do, but doing nothing.

I'm in the lib, have just finished browsing through Marketing books for my Tourism Planning and Marketing course tomorrow. Still haven't got a copy of the lessons for Humanities course, I'm just surfing the net before I go home. Wala lang. Well I'm doing something sort of educational naman. I'm reading about my hometown--Navotas--so that I'd be ready in case I had to promote it impromptu. Haay, tourism.

Lyka perked up my spirit by showing me a gay site (read: pink flags waving!) that's apparently being visited by the previous users of the computer station we're using. Fabuloush. I's (my own version of I was) never aware that this actually exists. Anyway, I'll surf through for fun.

Me, Him and Her
Currently feeling: Tired
Singing along: I'm Feeling You by Michelle Branch

Introduction. Gosh I'm so tired, my body's having a hard time adjusting to my wake up time plus the wearisome travel to and from school. Listening to the professors discuss their required activities, projects, special projects and all other requirements makes me feel more ngarag than ever. This just might be the most tedious twenty one units of my college life. The final semester.

Anyway, back to the topic [of my title]. Since I wanna sleep na, I'll make this brief. See, I think I always end up liking somebody who happens to like someone else. It's because I tend to see how much he likes [or loves] her which in turn makes me envy--sort of--her because she's lucky that she's got someone who likes her as much as he does. Comments requested. Yun lang po. *bow* Blogger almost falling asleep while typing.

Nightmare on F Street
Currently feeling: Sad
Listening to: Hari ng Sablay by Sugarfree

Past three in the morning today, I have been asleep for only about two hours when I felt my sister tug my foot and say, "Ate! Ate!" Still half asleep, I got to my senses and heard a loud wailing sound. I thought, in a split second, that maybe my sis got scared from whatever was the source of the sound. I opened my eyes and saw my sister pointing outside our bedroom window. My bed being adjacent to the window, I sat up and turned a hundred and eighty degrees.

I initially saw an orange sky and clouds. After another split second, I realized there were huge flames. "Ah, shit!," was the first thing I said. The fire was more like a block and half away from our house, but the view from our window makes it seem like it's just three houses away. I have never, in my life, seen and watched fire this big and this close.

I sat frozen, hugging a big pillow, staring at the fire. You can tell I was so scared. I think I did not blink for minutes. More firetrucks kept passing by our house as I sat there feeling so helpless. My dad ran off already to help out. I heard people yelling outside to warn pedestrians of the rushing trucks. I saw our neighbors get out on their balconies to see how far away the fire was. Or rather, how near. But still, my eyes focused on the billowing clouds of smoke and the terrifying huge flames. Smoke seemed to me like the Hiroshima-Nagasaki atomic bomb mushroom cloud, only this time they were more like button mushrooms than umbrella ones. And they're many. I was observing wind direction; I was observing everything.

In my mind, a lot things are running through. I silently prayed for the fire not to spread towards our house; I prayed for the victims, firemen and fire volunteers. I actually thought about what I'm gonna take with me in case we needed to evacuate if our house is on fire: our birth certificates, passports, diplomas, other important documents and identification, jewelry which can be as good as cash, cash of course, and maybe a few photos lying around. I thought about whether I knew anybody near the site, luckily I knew nobody.

Thirty minutes into staring, my eyes started to hurt, the fire was out. I felt like crying because of the fear and helplessness plus the adrenalin rush. And for the concern that I felt through the SMS messages that my friends sent me, asking about our home and the family. I feel so bad for the victims, especially that it's just a matter of fifty days or so before Christmas. Anyway, I did not cry. Because it would make my sister cry. (She's psychologically disturbed lately.)

Please pray for the victims of the fire. And as thanksgiving to the fire volunteers, my heroes. Bye for now, I have to go through my clothes to donate some for the less fortunate ones today.

Adeng No More
Currently feeling: Relaxed
Listening to: Fill Me In by Craig David

Home sweet home! I'm so happy to be back, saw my friends yesterday at the cemetery... Kahit na di ako nakapunta nung Halloween party which they've organized, I'm excited to see everybody else but I can't wait to see the love of my life: Zoe! Wasn't able to say goodbye before I left so I ought to see Zoe asap.

To our Baguio friends: I hope we'd still keep in touch through Friendster or YM at least. We'll let you know if we're in town again. Can never forget your kindness, I hope you'd never forget what we may have shared to you (like what LSS meant). I realized I was starting to understand the local dialect before we were off for Manila, though I knew how to count one to three. Anyway, t'was nice knowing you guys, definitely see you again someday. To Rach and Taritz, I'll drop by your house sometime again; drop by ours if you're in town. To Andrei and Kabs, sorry I wasn't able to meet up with you during my stay. Next time.

So some Baguio anecdotes for you. Alam niyo bang [in Baguio] when people hear that you're from Manila, you're synonymous to the expression "Yeah/Yah". Sabi nila super word daw kase yan ng mga taga-baba. Yah right! Hehe.. And LSS [Last Song Syndrome] hasn't reached civilization there. Anyway when my sis was watching Pinoy Big Brother eviction night a week ago, wherein this girl named Chx was evicted, she said, "Ganto pala sa outside world," when asked by host Toni Gonzaga what it's like to be 'out'. To which my sister exclaimed, "Ate, pag-uwi siguro naten sabihin ko din, 'Wow, ganto pala sa outside world!,'" Kulet diba.

I came to understand her boredom because I experienced a bit what hell was for her. Out of boredom, we've done so much nonsense. I think I've written the lyrics of almost all the songs on my mp3 player! We've almost finished a book of loop-a-word puzzles, and my sis has created her own loop-a-word puzzles too. Some of her puzzles even containing all the states of America! I've even created 'letterings' for numerous names, kulang na lang makagawa ako ng sarili kong font style (I'm working on it).

The best I've done so far was an ambigram for my name. Finally! Being someone who states 'lettering' as a hobby, I got so inspired to make one after a jaw-dropping amazement at the ambigrams on Dan Brown's novel, Angels and Demons. It's still on paper so I can't show it yet, I'd have to scan it or do it on Adobe Photoshop pa. Whatever.

After a week of being offline, the Friendster messages got stacked up. A particularly interesting one is an inquiry on why I don't include a photo of myself on my left side column of this blog page. I never really thought it'd matter. But for those who're wondering as well, here's my side. Well, I don have a photo of me--up there--but it's a silhouette of me, Lara Croft style at the shooting location of Tomb Raider [I forgot which one]: Ankor Wat, Cambodia. So why not a non-silhouette pic? Umm because I created this blog for my thought so I think it should be the main attraction (not that my face would grab the spotlight or anything). Plus, I wouldn't want anybody pondering why I'm born with such unpleasant face when all I wanted to display were my thoughts. And in a world of no anonymity, there's always a way to find out how I actually looked like if you're that curious and eager. Oh, sounds familiar... :)

Back to Baguio stories... (ang gulo ba?) There's this one night that out of boredom I had two cups of strong blend coffee. As you may have guessed, I wasn't able to sleep a wink. The morning after, I looked like a zombie and I borrowed my sis' phone and took pics of myself, horrible enough to be a model. A model for halloween! :) There's an Amy Lee of Evanescence-like photo (yung sa album nila, I forgot the album name), then a Christina Ricci deadringer for Sleepy Hollow. Spooky!

My dreamland experiences in Baguio are quite spooky enough. My dreams have been telling me some things lately. Or were they really? Judge. First, I dreamt of Camille, my friend's cousin. Nothing unusual about the dream, I just came across her while I was walking down a dark street, I recognized her because she was laughing hard and when she recognized me, she blushed and smiled shyly [she was with a guy]. When I woke up, I sent my friend an SMS message and told her of what I dreamt about. She replied by saying Camille had just underwent surgery of the appendix. Okay. Next. On the night of the 24th, I dreamt about my friend's elder sister Diana. The 24th is the actual schedule of Diana's interview at the British Embassy (for migration). In my dream, her interview yielded negative results because she forgot to pay for some other fees. When I woke I sent an SMS message again to my friend. Sure enough, interview results were negative because she lacked--not payments--IDs! By this time I'm amazed, and somehow thought they may just be coincidences. Then, the night before my parents were supposed to arrive at Baguio to fetch us, I dreamt that when I woke up, my mom's there already. Which is contrary to their 2pm arrival schedule. When I actually woke up, I told my sister that maybe our parents are coming in earlier than expected. By 10am, my mom sent an SMS saying they're in Baguio na..

Hmmm.. What do you think? Should I be waiting what's gonna happen with another dream, wherein I was reunited with a friend way back elementary days? And with yet another dream where I got together (romantically) with a highschool batchmate who's been so affectionate but was never actually my type? Keeps me wondering. *wink*

Expensive Solidarity
Currently feeling: Tired
Listening to: With You by Jessica Simpson

Yes I mean it. And this does not necessarily relate to my single stat. All I meant was, when you're alone--at least in my case--you tend to spend more than what you usually spend. No, I didn't mean that I get paid for by whoever I'm with everytime. It's just that unlike when I'm with somebody else, endless window shopping or long hours at Starbucks or plain tambay fueled with lots of stories and laughters would sure make time fly by. When alone, I can't window shop for hours coz I get tired easily (I walk briskly) and more often than not, I end up buying stuff. I can spend a couple of hours max at a coffee shop alone but that would make me frequent the counter to have my fave ham&cheese croissant in addition to my frap or cup of coffee; half an hour later, it's the Belgian waffle I'm targeting, and so on. And tambay won't make much sense to me, unless there's a fantastic view (or lots of stars).

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the loner part of me. I used to enjoy goin' out by myself (but for a specific purpose, not just to kill time). I remember there's this one night I was driving alone and if not for an SMS message, I wouldn't realize that I heading towards Cavite/Tagaytay! I was around Parañaque already when I got to my senses... Oh, count that out coz I was so depressed that time, I really didn't know what I was doing that night.

Oh dear. Looks like my thoughts aren't quite organized and my post's going nowhere!! Haha

---

Read at Your Own Risk
Currently feeling: Devilish
Listening to: Come Clean by Hilary Duff

One foggy afternoon I was at Mines View Park here in Baguio, enjoying the view of course. Di ko namalayan may tumabi na pala saken, umupo sa tabi ko. Edi dedma. Tas pasimple, tingen kung cute (ay lalake nga pala un), well betcha by freakin golly wow, good enough, cute nga. Tas edi wala lang, tingen lang sa view. Abah, kinausap ako. Unfortunately, Ilokano ang dialect. So I gave a puzzled look para naman mafeel nia na di ko naintindihan diba. (muka na siguro akong
Igorota??)

So anyway, as most Baguio people, marunong naman magtagalog. So usap. Chika. Wala lang..
'Gang hingian na ng cel number. Asteg! So mejo matagal na ko sa Baguio, text text lang. hehe kahet magkaiba ng network, okay lang hahhaa...

Aion, tas to make the long story short... May boyfriend na ko.

Tas lage sha pumupunta sa house namen dito sa Baguio, meet pag pumupunta ko ng
city or ng SM Baguio... Kaya aion, sasama sha pababa ng Manila pag umuwi ako to meet my parents and grandparents pati mga kapatid ko.

Tas after ko magcollege dito ako titira, hanap
nalang ako work dito..

Tas papakasal kame... :) Like ako ng parents nia eh.. Hihi *blush*



Too good to be true?

REALLY.




I mean, really, it's too good to be true.







So in short, di totoo.. Hahaha..
Joke joke joke!!






Yes, I'm wasting your time.








Kaya nga read at your own risk ang title diba?? :)


Peace!

Lean On
Currently feeling: Overwhelmed
Listening to: Photograph by Nickelback

To show or extend our [emotional] support to a problematic friend, we usually ask about the problem then unerstand it fully to be able to give a sound solution, judgment or advice. But the greatest form of support that we [could] give is non-verbal. Yes, the I'm-here-you-know-that feeling that we express sans the words. Coz sometimes the person doesn't actually need/want to talk about it and to be advised about it. Or, at times, there's just no plausible explanation and/or solution. Usually, we do this to the most important people in our life.

Days back, a very important person [of my life] got so depressed. Not wanting to seem prying nor deepen his sadness (yes, he's a he), we did the most we could for the following days. For most people, we seemed like all's fine. Nothing unusual; no tension at all.

As the night turned to day and the day turned to night, time came for us to part. Still, nothing unusual. He brought me home, a quick hug and beso, then it's bye-bye time. On his way home, I sent him an SMS message: ingat,, i hpe u enjoyd inspite of un4tun8 crcumstances. I fought the urge to do the verbal thing... I was almost asleep when he replied: im cryng ryt nw hir at ---- bcos i was so touchd. i was rly dpresd ystrday bcoz of ---, nd i knew hw hard u tried 2 mke d bst out of d stuation. thnk u so mch nd i love u. (Sorry, I had to omit some parts for personal reasons.)

Being the crybaby that I was, I couldn't help myself from crying. I cried because I'm so happy that my unspoken effort had been appreciated. I cried because I know how hard things are for him. And I cried coz I can't be at his side through all these, I'm miles away!

To this unnamed person: I'm here. Always. I know you know that. Loveyah too. :)

Balcony Thoughts
Currently feeling: floating
Listening to: the sound of a clear night's sky

(Blogger's note: This post, sort of a diary entry, was written earlier on my steno notepad. October 19, 2am.)

So here I am, dressed in my PJs and purple Eeyore foot gloves, lookin' out from the balcony of a Baguio condo unit which we used every summer for the past one and a half decade. Tonight, however, shall be the last. The timeshare contract has expired and I, together with my elder bro and younger six-month pregnant sister, have this chance to use it for the last night. It's way past my Baguio bedtime but I don't want to sleep; savoring every last minute of it. Like my very much awake kuya, reminded of the sentimental value it has. So, though it's 2am, I'm out here at the balcony gazing at the city lights kilometers away, enjoying the cool breeze and enchanted by the clear sky, twinkling stars and a bright full moon.

I never thought this place would actually have this much value to me. I mean, it's just a place to stay, to sleep, to freshen up for all I know. We may find other units better and cozier than this fifth floor room, but it's just that Baguio vacation won't ever be the same without this. See, I've been in town for more or less two weeks now, but I haven't really felt that I AM here until this afternoon that me and my siblings went here.

Maybe it's the calmness, the peace, and serenity it brings... It's like everytime I gaze at the sky from this balcony, I'm much more closer to inner peace (heaven?) literally and figuratively. Like now, I think about so many things that I have not thought of for a while. Like, there's a connection between me and the stars that makes me so focused and centered on what I'm pondering on: problems, dilemmas, and a whole lot more.

Why can't the moon just get me from this balcony and let me float through the skies and the clouds? Sometimes I wish I could do just that and be ridden from all the worries and pains. Even for just a day. Or maybe even nirvana for an hour would be great. A whole hour of having to worry, think and reflect on nothing. Pure happiness and lightness. Won't that be nice?

When I was younger "ultimate happiness" isn't so hard to achieve. Why can't life be always like that: simple? Maybe if I can't float mid-air right now, I hope I could replay an instance when I felt so happy, light and no worries. The type of feeling when you could actually think that it's okay to die at that exact moment coz you couldn't be happier...

I'm gettin older, eh? Life's getting more and more complicated each day.

Geez, stars really make one sentimental. Ta-ta.

Courtship Filipino Style
Currently feeling: Silly
Listening to: Sa Kanya by MYMP

I've come to believe that I don't actually believe in courtship. Weird as it may seem, I don't--at least for courtship Filipino style. Most Pinoy men (I said most, not all) do it full of crap. It's merely supposed to be a get-to-know-each-other-better stage which evolved into a survival-of-the-fittest thing or, worse, padamihan ng pogi points.

See, once a guy has decided to 'court' a girl, he starts shitting himself by doing stuff that are so unlike him just to be pleasing to the girl's eyes. I have nothing against those guys who suddenly became poetic coz inspiration struck; I loath those who really just does things to make the girl his. The worst part is, the girl falls for the guy na puno naman ng kaplastikan, and then after a few months into the steady stage, his true colors will be revealed. Then, emotional chaos begins.

It sucks. Nobody wants to be loved by mistake and nobody wants to love by mistake either. Why pretend to be perfect? Hmmm...

On a personal note, I think it's why I've somehow (and some time) resorted to pseudo relationships. The setup where you've just figured out that you both like each other and so you enjoy your time together. No commitment. No strings attached. I think that's what courtship should actually be! After which, you decide whether to go steady or not. Unfortunately, the courtship stage had been stereotyped on most Filipino minds like what I had described earlier.

I hope this is enough to stop eyebrows from raising when I say,

"I dont have suitors."

or

"I don't really believe in courtship eh.."

Reminder: This doesn't necessarily mean that I am in a pseudo relationship at the moment. Okay? Just makin' myself clear.

I am unique (abnormal?) and so are my thoughts. I know lots of guys may discriminate me for my stand; I welcome comments, violent reactions and explanations. Quite some time into this belief, I haven't met a guy who had convinced me to believe otherwise (obviously!). I'd love to be proved wrong on this, actually. :) Silly me. Ah, whatever. You get my point.

Ampanget ko pala sa webcam (o panget lang talaga ako?) First time ko magwebcam while I'm in a computer shop here in Baguio coz namimiss na daw ako ng friends ko so they wanna see me na, even through webcam. Oh, first time ko pala magwebcam alone, before kase pag nakawebcam yung ex ko nakikisingit ako nakiki-"hi" sa mga kachat nia ehehehe.

+ + +

I'm starting to get really bored around here, and I'm running out of moolah. It's sort of a consolation that I found a computer shop near our house (walking distance) so maybe that could lessen my boredom. I'm not really a TV junkie so cabled television doesn't make me any better.

Good thing my bro's comin' over sometime next week. Yey! Missed him already. My dad's sending me money through him din. :) Kami parehas, we're claiming to be an 'only child'; siya yung retard, ako yung abnormal. Tandem! Ayaw patalo ng isa't isa so now my mom calls us the 'only children'. Wala katuwaan lang.

+ + +

Last Song Syndrome:
"...tumatakbo ang oras naiiwan na ako ng panahon..."

- a line from Tumatakbo by Mojofly

+ + +

Uh, there's nothing 'bloggable' to say right now (not that my previous posts are) so hafta cut this off.

Geez... The climate's making me sick. When you wake up, darn, it's so hot. Like the sun's piercing through your skin. Then past lunchtime, fog starts blocking your way and then, rain. :( I'm suffering from the ultimate colds of my life. Yesterday, all I did was sleep. (Remember how terrible colds makes one drowsy.) If I can, I'd stop the rain from pouring so I can step out after lunch and walk til eternity.

Ironically, the song I love says, "...rain, rain please don't go away..." (Rain Rain by Nyoy Volante).

Anyway, to compensate loneliness, I shop. Ukay ukay still. Can't believe you can have so much for so little. Mind you, quality means everything to me. I used to shop through ukay-ukays but this time it isn't summer so the prices are much, much lower compared when we go through these stores during summertime. Like today, I went to the city to shop and go online and wait for my sister, I spent like three hundred or so. That's about ten pieces of clothing, I think. Kaso lang, the money we were able to save from shopping is usually spent to have them clean (laundry shop). We don't do the laundry here kase since my lola doesn't have a washing machine, and it takes forever to be dry if you don't have a tumble dryer (or drier?).

I feel like I'm in a dorm or a boarding house; before, I used to wonder how it'd feel like having to think about everything, from food to laundry to having to deal with so little cash on hand. Independent, in short.

+ + +

It's overwhelming to receive [so many] messages and comments from all of you... Sensha na super tagal magreply, nasa bundok eh. Di ko kinakaya to, once a week lang ako maginternet! Sheesh. :(

Ahh... The perks of being in Baguio. Fashion! Astig. Except for the ukay ukay thingie wherein there's a gazillion choices of affordable clothes ranging from fashionable to I-won't-wear-that-even-if-it-was-the-last-piece-of-clothing-on-Earth type which brings out the creativity in you, putting on layers of clothes is challenging--and cool. The uso fashion in Manila where a blouse is on top of another is totally in and appropriate here--unlike 300 kilometers back where you'd get eyebrows raised if you sport that look.

So what am I wearing now? Denims, knitted sleeveless blouse, heels, and my current fave: black trenchcoat. This porma is never 'out' here.

Baguio, summer capital. Though it's not summer, I'm here na. I rode a bus yesterday 7am and got here around 2pm... I was walking along the street where my lola lives and people are like staring at me because of the following reasons: (1) pormang di taga Baguio; (2) pulling a big stroller along; (3) and it's drizzling and my only protection is my small Tigger pillow. Ha ha ha. Well anyway at least I arrived safely.

Bus ride was okay, wala akong katabi. When the bus left the station, we were like less than 20pax, and though pinapara along the way, I maintained my two-seat seat. :) It wasn't boring at all 'cause I slept through it mostly while my ears are flooded with sounds from my portable mp3 player.

Somewhere Pampanga, a group boarded the bus and somebody actually talked to me. Description: male, cute, fair skinned, red lips... In short, charming and adorable. The sweetest voice on earth. He asked me how I am, what's my name, sang songs, offered cupcakes and smiled always. Kept me alive through zigzag travel; it's amazing that he wasn't dizzy at all nor even have a my-ears-are-popping feeling. Name's Gelo. From Angeles. He's three. *fooled you*

+ + + + +

Today, we woke up early and went to Burnham Park where I jogged for half an hour while my sister's having breakfast afterwhich I dropped her off at her school (she's taking English Proficiency lessons, but will take up Art lessons this morning). I walked somewhere and found my fave tourist attractions in Baguio: ukay-ukay (a.k.a. wagwagan here)! So as of now I've bought a couple of jackets and a skirt and a long sleeved blouse. (Costs P140 in all, if you're wondering.) There's a really cool pair of casual Kenneth Cole shoes but it's P380... I'll have to think about that. I'm a real kuripot!

Surfing the net while waiting for her to finish at 11am, I'll meet her for lunch then she's off to her English lessons by 2am. As for me, I'll take a hike :) to reach SM Baguio [my favorite mall] and do groceries para sa bahay and other miscellaneous items I need.

+ + + +

I wonder what's happening back home. Have they bought us the most appropriate bed? Construction on going inside our room? How are my stuffed toys, are they an inch thicker with dust? Mm, how's my kuya doing? And the PMA written exam passer? Oh well.

To my family back home: Mika's big bellied now, and lotsa zits on the face. Mmm... what other things to say? Pormang taga Baguio na! Har har.

Attention to all texters: wala pong signal yung Sun ko dito sa Baguio so please send messages to my Globe number.

Last September 30, we had a dinner celebration for my lola at Hyatt Casino Manila's Lili Restaurant. It's a Chinese restaurant, and the ambience is nice. We had reservations for their 'Library' function room. They also have 'Drawing Room', 'Wine Cellar Room'. The themes are amazing, and they live up to the expectations.

Well, in such a nice restaurant, I do know that it costs quite a fortune. But I never expected that it could be sooo expensive. Expectedly, we paid a little less than 30T for nineteen persons. Out of nowhere I told my dad that it's quite more than what we usually pay for special occasions. He just smiled and said, "the appetizer soup costs P300, already, what more for the main course?" So I just shrugged. Bragging aside, I'm used to having expensive meals once in a while.

I think I looked unfazed, so my dad made me guess what type of food costs the most on the resto's menu. Giving up easily (coz I wouldn't know whether they serve Angus steaks or whatever), he said, "a bowl of soup." I thought, soup? Soup's not an entree per se. How can a certain bowl of soup (for one person) be the most expensive item on the menu, overtaking beef courses or seafood? Can't be! No way!

Guessing game began. I tried guessing how much this certain soup for a single person could cost. I started with a thousand and ended bidding up to a thousand eight hundred then I gave up.

It's four thousand pesos. Unbelievable.

+++

I finished Angels and Demons in a matter of a little over 24hours! I started reading it at around 2pm Sunday then I finished it 6pm Monday. Not to mention I got busy Monday morning at school. We had to submit forms because we're selected to be ushers sa SEA Games... So there. I've also finished CSS customizing my Friendster profile; I'm more or less contented.

+++

To my dear cousin Lennard, who's at the UST hospital right now, I hope you get well soon. It's really hard to miss final exams, especially in the oldest university. Oldest system. Oldest whatsoever. Tsktsk. I hope it's not dengue or anything worse.

+++

Lastly, I'm moving out (temporarily) by Thursday morning. I'm going to Baguio to be with my sister who's getting quite depressed now. Maybe be back by November. Gosh, I'm gonna miss long hours on the net, editing photos on this pc, my audio CDs, and my friends of course. *sob* Can't believe I'll be missing out on my last sembreak.

I have a hobby now. Editing photos of friends using Adobe Photoshop. After two days I have edited about ten in all. Wanna see them? Take a peek at my "gallery". He-he. See the original pic then the edited one. It's mostly editing backgrounds and adding text. I don't do faces, I'm afraid that I might accidentally make them less beautiful. *naks*

Ironically, I don't edit my own pic! I just can't. I'm afraid I'd look like a monster afterwards. :)

I've also been trying my best to CSS-customize my Friendster account. The thing is, I'm not familiar with CSS, so some default settings aren't overridden. :( Makes my page look jologs.

I was bloghoppin' today, something I haven't done for months. You must realize how bored I am, that's why I'm reading other people's opinions and experiences. Well I came across this one blogger, who's so emotional with the posts, it almost made me cry. Like if only there's such thing as e-hugs, I'll probably be sending him [yea, it's a guy] lots of 'em. Too bad my comments aren't welcome on his page since I ain't a member of his blog provider. If only I could befriend him, I would.

Since I'm on the blog topic... Is it just me who gets bothered by the frequent Friendster reminder that "[name of friend] update his/her Friendster blog". I chose to activate the email notifier of Friendster so that I wouldn't have to check my account everytime just to see if anybody added me or if I have a new testimonial or whatever. Then they'll go flooding the inbox to say so and so updated the blog. I think blogs are supposed to be visited by people at their own free time, and not a 'must' everytime your friend updates it. I don't know. Maybe I just am bored and there's nothing to think of. *Weird*

*sheesh* How weird could I possibly be? *eyes roll*

+ + +

There's a stupid gossip going around. Allegedly, a group of people saw me and my whole family at Video City, including my pregnant sister. Also, according to the source, they were telling everyone about how big my sister's belly is already (uh, she's five months in the making). Ridiculous! My sister has been in Baguio [that's like three hundred kilometers away] for three months now! (She may have been two months pregnant then but it's not even noticeable.) I haven't even seen my sister with a bulging belly. Nor does she have pictures posted wherein she's uber-pregnant. Oh geez, talk about people na walang magawa sa buhay. Ha ha...

+ + +

I think I'm getting too old for fairy tales. I've lost the childish side of me which always hopes for a happily-ever-after life [or lovelife]. Though it's a good thing that I'm more of a realistic thinker than idealistic, it doesn't seem too nice at all... I'm always seeing the possible outcomes of a certain action--the positive and the negative side. And when I visualize the negative side, sometimes I just don't go for it; unlike before, though there's a possible negative outcome, I go with the come-what-may attitude. What's happening to me? Slowly my life's becoming a drab.

Earth calling Katia! I know I can't possibly stay too long with this kind of attitude, or else I'll go nowhere. Am I too old for my age? My dad thinks so. That's why he says my interest drifts from one person to another so fast, coz nobody seems to be of the same level of interest, thoughts and whatever. I agree to that theory--partly. Sometimes the conversations are so mababaw, getting me bored to death. Ironically, out of boredom I continue with the conversation. I mean, I'm mababaw when it comes to jokes and all, but to reach a certain level of intimacy/togetherness--for me--needs (and stems from) good conversations.

At times I wonder, there are lots of guys around [me], no good conversations at all? I mean, what do you do with a hottie who does nothing else but to be pacute and pasweet; or a pseudo partner with whom you realize that you're just not on the same wavelength; how about the cutie who falls in love at first sight; or a desperate old pal? Duh. Then my brother interjects: maybe you haven't really just been 'out there' at all to be able to meet 'the guys'. Is it me? Or is it them? Or I'm just not meant to have it right now?

This post is dedicated to everyone who ever said I look like these people (God have mercy and pity on them!) or in any angle alike. Whatever.


First off, Christina Ricci. I agree that I look like her--only on Casper. That's it.

Second, Alicia Silverstone. I think it's my brother's classmate who told my kuya about it. Of course, I don't see the similarity--at all. He says it's when she smiles that I look a bit like her...?

Uh, Katie Holmes? It's the deep set eyes. And cheekbones *daw*?

Gilmore Girls' Rory--Alexis Bledel.

Next, Jaycee (or is it JC?) Parker of Viva Hotbabes. :( Then there's former Promil kid Shaira Luna. I think it's because I also got huge eyes... Kitchie Nadal? She's way too pretty!

Okay guys, it's for you to decide... ;)

My usual boring day got an oomph today. I'm so sad that me and my friends didn't have the chance to watch the last UAAP Nestle Nonstop Cheerdance Competition of our college life; I consoled myself by watching the live telecast instead. Volume's up so it'd feel like I'm there. I watched the whole thing, didn't even switch channels even while commercials are on. Hehe.. An avid fan, huh? Well anyway, I think every school prepared for their respective performances so well, and most have the least errors ever. It's the best ever for all the schools, even for DLSU Pep Squad! No pun intended! :)

I went so neutral while watching the whole show, so I made a good prediction of the top three--I got them correctly! All's constant: 2nd runner up: FEU Pep Squad, 1st runner-up: UP Pep Squad, and we are the champs (UST Salinggawi Dance Troupe)! I predicted so because of the following reasons.

FEU gave a very smooth performance, actually after their performance I said "Okay yun a!", but it's not a hundred percent original, plus their uniforms are last year's. For UP, they're okay, kinarir ang Nonstop portion so I know they'd have a chance to snatch the crown back. But when I saw UST's performance (UP performed before them), it's a no-brainer. I mean, UP's stunts and routines were "all original" (according to their courtside reporter) and really hard to perform, but overall, UST 'cheerdanced' better. The moves are perfectly in synch, you'd wonder how many months they've prepared for this. I didn't really like their uniform though, it's so--tiger-ish! Like, *meow*, oops I mean, *roar*. ;)

So I'd like to congratulate the 4-peat UAAP Nestle Nonstop Cheering Competition Champs, the University of Santo Tomas Salinggawi Dance Troupe! Now I think, did I really inspire them to win? Ever since I enrolled myself in the university, they won every cheering competition, til now--my senior year... hmmmm? Just kidding!

UST Roar for 4!

somebody save me

I've finished reading Amy Tan's The Hundred Secret Senses. Boy, oh boy, I learned a lot from it. Maybe because some of the Chinese principles are actually my principles too (or Filipinos's too, since we've had great Chinese influence, eh). Who'd have thought that a book with a funny looking cover would contain such great ideas and views in life? I can't believe I ignored it for so long. I recommend reading it, to people who love to read more than just fiction... (I mean it's fiction--yeah--but the lessons are..well..real.. whatever.) To anyone who loved The Celestine Prophecy and the Tenth Insight, would sure love this too. Anyway here are a few morals I've learned:

+ For some people, Yin isn't Yang, and Yang isn't Yin. Learn to respect other people's principles and opinions.

+ Everyone must dream. We dream to give ourselves hope. To stop dreaming is like saying you can never change your fate.

+ The doctrine of determinism: All the events and even human choices follow natural laws.

+ Too much happiness always overflows into tears of sorrow.

I hope you'd have a copy and read it and enjoy it as much as I did. By the way, thanks to Tita Grace who sent the book years back I think.


+++


The hurricane Katrina really devastated New Orleans, I feel so sorry for all the victims. By the way, I am a different Katrina, so don't go blaming me! He-he. I included them in my prayers that they may recover and start again. Material things may be built or restored again, but lives cannot be.

While I'm at the topic of fortuitous events, I'd like to commemorate (and pray for) the victims of the 9/11 attack, and the heroes behind it too. I hope all's better.


+++


I've been at home for a whole month now, and it's a bore.

What energy pushes me to get up from bed even if I have nothing to do?
High noon's heat energy.

What keeps me busy?
Playing downloaded games, reading books, answering Friendster surveys, blogging and chatting.

What makes my mind work?
Thinking of what meal to prepare for the working and schooling housemates (which is like, everybody except me).

Where do I go when I go out of the four corners of our house?
The supermarket, doing groceries.

What's the best part of my day?
Having someone to talk to--that's when the people are already at home--and taking a bath.

Oh dear, somebody save me...

In less than an hour, I went through emotional extremes. Extremely happy then uber sad and down in a snap. Time to play emo? Well this is what a commitment-free setup is about. It can't possibly be all smiles; the hardest and worst part is, you can't go and be grumpy or yell at that someone if you're hurt. 'Coz there's absolutely no commitment. No right to go mad and crazy. Sheesh.

What's worse than being compared and coming in second to somebody? Someone on a pedestal or something like it. The untouchable, unreachable, unfathomable... I do not intend to be the best, nor exceed what and who she is, just no comparison please. As my blog title goes: I'm no you, everyone's extremely unique. I'm no her, I'm no anybody.

So what have i done these past weeks? I've just finished my five hundred hours requirement for my one and only subject this semester, practicum. I'm elated and at the same time, I'm missing the embassy friends and lunchmates. They've been real nice to me. So I'm making a post for updates...again.

I've finished reading the The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown (a gift from my supervisor), and I'm quite surprised to know that a friend actually had finished most of what I wanted to read. It's really not like him. He's lending me Angels and Demons. I still have to finish Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (reading from a pdf file) and another Dan Brown pdf too. Since I'd be a bum for around three months or so, I intend to read as much as I can...

I just figured out lately that I really have lots of things that I want to be or have. I want to be a president's daughter, a print ad model, a rockstar, a violinist, a good singer and a photographer. I want to take voice lessons, two foreign language courses, personality development trainings, and photography classes. I want to save up for a good camera. A friend who's taking up Fine Arts asked me if I'd like to be their model/subject for at least a session during their photography class, I said I don't mind (As long as it's not nude photography!); the thing is, I'm really envy that they get to have photog classes. :( I wish I could save up and attend photog classes...

Hmm I got to go, I still have chores to do. Lam mo na, katulong eh. :) Catchya guys later.

My kuya's been making me go around tech-shops at Greenbelt so I could take a look at mp3 players of all models--Zens, Samsungs, iRivers, and iPods of course--taking notes on its prices (including PayLite prices)... For all I know, he'll end up buying an iPod mini anyway. Why? Coz he digs iPod because it's an iPod! *duh* I mean, I was seriously discouraging him from buying an iPod (am suggesting iRiver), because of the lack of features. All it could do is store files for you to play, whereas others include tuner, voice recorder, etc (my iRiver has line-in recording, voice, tuner, and you could also record from FM). And he does admit that mine delivers sound better than any of the iPods he's borrowed; still, he's buying one. DUH!

I am not against iPod nor iPod users for that matter, but for my kuya, that's weird. Have never known him to buy something that would put his money to waste (I mean, he waited for the I-forgot-what-Nokia-model-it-was to be out here in the Philippines before he gave up his good ol 7110 because it's got the best features ever, then invested on thousands of pesos), but he's investing thousands again for something that's tunog lata compared to others (for someone so musically inclined and at the same time a band member-slash-music composer!)? I'm trying to convince him to test other models first--not fashion models, silly--and try out how well the sound goes, and for him to take into consideration the features (he's the guy who can't live without radio, but he's settling for an all-mp3 thing). How on earth could my kuya turned into someone who's into brands (or what everyone has)? For all I know, he's gonna die if he's not gonna buy an iPod. Freakin' stupid.

(These reactions are with regards to my kuya only, not to f*** up iPod lovers. Oops, and yeah, am not sabotaging iPod/Apple in anyway. I just hate it when people are so branded--- *okay I'll shut up now*)


***


I have a pdf format of Harry Potter 6; it seems like a scanned-then-saved-as-a-text-format version so I see some misspelled words. I am no Potter fan or whatever, nary an intent of buying them, so I read it only when I've nothing to do in the office. Again, no offense to Mr Potter's fans, and JK Rowling. If anybody's interested, let me know,,, oh, I'm sorry Ms Rowling.


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I'm stuck with a song "Dream of Me," which Kirsten Dunst sang in a movie (in a scene where she's acting in a play). Now I can't remember what movie it was. And how foolish could it be that all I can sing from the whole song was "...dream of me..."


***


Has anyone got a copy or knows a bookstore that carries Confessions of a Video Vixen? Let me know. I'm not quite sure if I wanna buy one though.

This week's rally was a big one, so we were looking out of our office window when it passed by RCBC (they're walking along Ayala Ave.). My officemates were seriously debating on the current political situation; others were complaining on the difficulty of going home due to this mass rally. There I was, standing, leaning on the glass window (of the 24th floor) when all of a sudden I let out a laugh. Confused, my officemates looked at me as if to ask, "what on earth is funny?" Well, as I'm seriously contemplating on the number of people walking arm-in-arm along Ayala, I saw some yellow thingies being pushed by a single person. I think I saw three of the same kind. I tried hard to figure out what those are... (If you're on the 24th floor, it may be hard to figure out!) Then I finally did! Fishball carts! Hahahaha... I even saw a taho vendor trying to keep up with the people's pace. Filipino entrepreneurs on the loose! :)

Anyway an officemate forwarded this email [still in connection with the Ayala Avenue rally]. It reads: (My apologies to the non-Filipino speaking peeps, I don't have the energy to translate this for you; and, it wouldn't capture the emotion if I did translate it.)

From: Law Division - Countryside Litigation Department - MBTC
[mailto:tlsabado@metrobank.com.ph]
Sent: Wednesday, July 13, 2005 5:15 PM
Subject: FW: Message to/from workers in Makati


All ye Makati - esp. Ayala/Paseo/Herrera/CBD workers:
Ano ba? Di ba tayo kikibo at magrereklamo na tuwing may %&#@ rally dito sa Ayala-Paseo Makati, tayong mga manggagawang galing sa mga lugar na malalayo, sasakay ng MRT, bus, FX, jeep, carpool, etc. ay kailangang bumaba either sa Landmark, Rustan's, etc. at maglakad patungo sa ating mga tanggapan? Ang iba sa atin, siguro, alas-kwatro pa lang ng umaga, naliligo na, nagsa-shampoo pa, magsusuot ng bagong plantsa at amoy Downy na uniporme, magsusuot ng bagong-kiwi or shine na sapatos (naka 2-3 inches high heels pa ang karamihan diyan) - tapos, sasabihin ng driver na, "hanggang dito na lang po, pasensiya na at sarado na ang derechong Ayala. Maglalakad na lang po tayo." Pagdating
mo sa opisina, amoy ewan ka na. Sa uwian ganun din. At kung sinuswerte ka, maglalakad ka ng umuulan-lan or umaambon-ambon pa. Bwisiiiit!

Matanong ko lang. Ilang empleyado o mangagawa ba ng Ayala/Paseo/BCD ang sumasali sa mga rally na ito? Kung konti o halos wala, bakit di na lang idaos ang rally nila sa mga matatao ding lugar na di nakapipinsala o nakaaabala sa mga gustong maghanapbuhay dito sa parting Ayala?

Mayor Binay - alam naming maluwag naman po sa bandang C-5 or sa parteng Pembo/Comembo, o kung saan man niyo pwedeng i-designate na lugar sa Makati. Sa palagay ko po, marami rin po ditong mga tao na makikinig sa mga talumpati o program na gustong iparating ng mga raliyista. Di po ba pwedeng dito na lang po kayo mag-bigay ng permit sa mga raliyista? Ke maka-Gloria, anti-Gloria, pro-Resign, pro-Chacha, etc. walang kaso. Okay lang yan! Mayroon (pa naman) tayong karapatan para sa malayang pamamahayag.

Pakiusap lang po. Maawa naman po kayo sa amin. Karamihan man sa amin ay di taga-Makati, marami po sa amin dito ay sa Makati nagbabayad ng buwis at nag-papaandar ng ekonomiya, di lang ng Makati, kundi ng buong bansa. Sana ay pangalagaan din po ninyo ang aming kapakanan bilang ama ng Makati.

If you agree, please forward to your friends working in Makati hanggang makarating (sana) sa ating mahal na alkalde.

I'm not quite sure if it was my officemate who added this:

Dagdag ko lang tong napulot kong coupon eto this morning sa Ayala, wow may seal pa ng Makati City at ang claim counter ay Makati city hall pa, common knowledge naman ang hakot system pero sana di naman ganito ka bulgar/garapal ...Paging Mayor Binay!

I just came home from UP. Blah blah blah. Wala akong maipost ngayon. Anyway, I'll just post a survey I answered in Friendster. Now I know why people love doing the surveys; it takes your mind off something you're really trying to think about or maybe actually make your mind think about something at all. Or stress relief.

1. are you straight?
----- nope, wavy hair. joke. Yeah of course I am.

2. are you in love right now?
----- I don't think so.

3. are you 18 or above?
---- on the last teen year.

4. do you drink alcohol?
---- I'm allergic, but I do. In small amounts.

5. do you drive?
---- Yes. It sucks that gas from home to UP and back again costs me 300 pesos. Darn.

6. do you live in manila?
---- uh, Metro Manila? :)

7. are you a fan of Smallville?
---- No.

8. do you think you're superior sometimes?
----- Yup. Sa kakulitan.

9. do you like dogs?
----- Yup, but I don't know how to take GOOD care of em. Almost wanna cry when I had to eat one. *still fresh from my memory, poor dog*

10. do you have a goal right now?
----- hm.. Finish my practicum? Save up maybe.

11. do you think it's possible for you to reach it?
---- Of course, I don't make unreachable goals. Am not that crazy to make my self depressed over an unreached goal.

12. ever been in love?
----- Who hasn't been?

13. been engaged in a fist fight?
----- Fist fight...? Nope.

14. stolen something from someone?
----- Does that include eating my mom's Milky Ways?

15. wish you were dead?
----- We all come to that point some time.

16. swore on someone?
---- Hmm..

17. slapped someone?
---- I can't remember, I think I haven't.

18. kissed someone for about a minute?
---- Hahahaha..

19. made someone cry?
---- I didn't mean to.

20. cried because of someone?
---- Everyone does. It's a form of bravery.

21. had a crush on the same sex?
---- No. But I do recognize who's pretty and hot. Jordana Brewster!!

22. had a crush on a friend?
---- Yea,

23. had a crush on a classmate?
---- Oo naman. Malamang!!

24. dated someone?
---- Ngek, what a question.

25. ever introduced a loved one to your folks?
---- Always.

26. held hands with a loved one for about an hour?
---- Yup. It comes out naturally.

27. gave everything you got for a loved one?
---- Uh, define everything? Like monetary or something? Haha.

28. have you ever been heartbroken?
---- Yup.

29. broke someone's heart?
---- I guess so. *sorry*

30. wish you could turn back time?
---- I hate regrets.

31. got pissed with a close friend?
---- Yup.

32. do you love your friends?
---- DEFINITELY.

33. do you trust them?
---- Would they be "friends" if I don't?

34. do you still see your trusted friends?
---- I see to it that we see each other every now and then.

35. do you have a love one right now?
---- I don't have just one, maybe a hundred--I love lots of people! *wahehe pilosopo*

36. do you love him/her?
---- Eh wala talaga.

37. do you think you're above him/her?
---- N/A

38. do you control relationships?
---- On a certain level, yes.

39. do you trust him/her?
---- Next set of questions please?

40. do you see yourself with him/her in the future?
---- Crystal ball please.

41. have you given him/her something
special?
---- Reminds me, I still want to buy my fave perfume brand for men, to give a future loved one maybe. So I'll save up for that.

42. made her/him cry?
---- ?

43. do you think you're sweet enough?
---- They say I am.

44. are you contented right now?
---- Yeah, I guess. Happy.

45. do you believe in soulmates?
---- I dunno.

46. are you confident with yourself?
---- Very much. It's a good thing to be confident at a young age. Most people aren't. That sucks. It entails lots of inferiority complex and psychological problems--although you may not be aware that it all boils down to lack of confidence.

47. lastly, do you regret something in the past?
---- I can't think of a specific thing that I regret about. Malamang meron di ko lang maisip kung ano.

m2m

Okay people. This is cool (supposedly).

Now that Marion Raven's gone solo, you'd never see the future of M2M right?

Wrong. They already have a future pic! So this is the M2M that you knoe...




And this, my friends, is the future of M2M. Hahahaha...

I'm so sorry if I'm offending anyone (especially maybe the fans?)...